In the situation of a manager and several team members we can identify four types of trust relationships. I describe each of these in four different blog posts. The first post was Trust Your People, the second was Earn Trust from Your People, and the third was Help People to Trust Each Other.
Every time I’m on a plane I get to see the safety instructions, reminding me that I have to put on the oxygen mask on myself first, before helping any obnoxiously screaming little bastards next to me. You can only save others if you save yourself first. Another version of this principle says that you can only love others when you love yourself first.
This gave me the idea to suggest the following alternative:
You can only trust others if you trust yourself first.
In Making Things Happen Scott Berkun describes why self-reliance is so important. You must believe in yourself, and stay true to your own reason and common sense, even when others disagree with you. You should only change your mind when new insights have convinced you, not when other people have pressured you to reconsider. Because doing something that you don’t believe in is an act against the trust in yourself. A self-reliant person has confidence in herself, while still allowing new information to change her mind.
And that is why you have to trust yourself.
You must trust your people (1), earn trust from your people (2), and help people to trust each other (3). And you can do all that only if you trust yourself (4).
This concludes my series on trust. I trust you found some value in it.
(image by MMMpictures)
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